My son (L) and his partner (M) both started new academic programs this summer term, so we’ve been talking a lot about school in our house, and I have been doing some advising and coaching with both of them. Last week, I happened to open my quote collection to these words from Marie Forleo:

“All progress begins with a brave decision.”

That struck a chord with me.

It takes a brave decision to start down a new academic and career path, all the more so as young parents.

It takes a brave decision to make lifestyle changes that position us to take control of our wellness.

It takes a brave decision to take on a physical challenge.

It takes a brave decision to create a meaningful retirement, living the life we want to live, making the difference we want to make in the world.

It takes a brave decision to invest in ourselves to get coaching or other support to help us achieve our goals.

It takes a brave decision to put our creative work—an extension of ourselves—out into the world.

Truly, any progress, any growth requires the courage to step out of our comfort zone into at least a bit of the unknown.

Coaching and advising L and M on their new academic paths got me thinking about and using some of my favorite tools for helping people—myself, my students, my clients, young people in my life—dig deep and find the courage to make and follow through on brave decisions that enhance lives and teach us even more about who we are.

I decided to share one of these concepts in this blog post.

Albert Bandura is the father of Self-Efficacy Theory, a social psychology theory that I have used and taught for many years because it made so much sense to me when I learned about it in grad school.

To illustrate the components of Self-Efficacy Theory, I have often used the story of my first time Biking Across Kansas in 1999. When my mom asked me after I had completed the cross-state pedal, “How did you know you could do it?” my first thought was, “How could I not try?” After learning about Self-Efficacy theory, I realized that the answer to her question was built by the key elements of the theory.

The next time you find yourself considering a daunting challenge, use these building blocks to bolster your sense of self-efficacy, which is your belief in your ability to accomplish what you set out to accomplish.

Step 1, Previous Experience of Mastery: Lay the foundation by recalling a time that you achieved a goal either similar to the one you are considering or preparing to undertake or at a similar level of challenge to this one. In the case of my first BAK, although I had only recently become a cyclist, I had a history of running, including running the 1996 New York City Marathon. Running the marathon had taken me far out of my comfort zone, including traveling with the Leukemia Society Team in Training to an unfamiliar city and then taking on my then biggest-ever physical challenge. I made the brave decision to do it, put in the work to prepare and completed it successfully. Recalling this experience gave me the confidence to believe that riding across the state was in the realm of possibility for me.

Step 2, Vicarious Success: Think about someone you know who has done something similar. My then boyfriend, now husband and his Kansas Air National Guard (KANG) buddies had ridden Biking Across Kansas 9 times before we met. He rode it a 10th time shortly after we got together. Although he was a terrific cyclist, he and his buddies were also regular people, not professional athletes or extraordinary physical specimens. He simply put in the work to prepare. I could do that, too.

Step 3, Verbal Persuasion: Consider who you can bring into your support system to encourage you and believe in you. Kenny and the KANG guys encouraged me. They told me that if I could run a marathon, I could bike long distances. While fitness is sport specific, what they were really referring to was the mindset that it takes to engage in endurance sports. They believed in me and told me so. That helped me to believe in myself.

Step 4, Recall of Affective State: Think about the experience you recalled in Step 1. How did it feel emotionally when you succeeded? Really embody that emotional experience so that it becomes visceral, and you feel it in your body once again. I thought back to my marathon and realized that I knew how to keep going, even when I was tired. I knew the exhilarated exhaustion of crossing the finish line, physically spent and emotionally energized. I liked that feeling. Just by recalling it, I could feel energy buzzing through my body. “Yeah, I can do this! I’m an athlete.”

Obviously, making the brave decision is only the start. You have to commit to yourself and the work it will take to achieve what you want to achieve, but this is where it begins—believing that you can do it.

The next time you are faced with a challenge, take the time, either in your head or in your journal or both, to walk through these steps. They just may help you make the brave decision that changes your life.

If you like this exercise, you may love the signature program that I will be announcing this summer, designed to help you get out of your own way, make brave decisions, enhance your wellness and move into a greater embodiment of your fullest, richest self in this one and only life we have. Stay tuned for more info!